


days to feel better

by orphan_account



Series: Orphanage Verse [1]
Category: Harry Potter - Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-01-11
Updated: 2008-01-11
Packaged: 2017-10-11 16:21:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/114304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Part 1 of the Orphanage Verse: Harry wants to feel better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	days to feel better

They had an apartment now. It wasn't a big apartment, but it was in London, and it had space for the two of them to have a room each, plus a living room beside the kitchen. There was also a spacious bathroom that Harry had decided he couldn't live without, after the muddiness and dirt of the war.

Ron had bought the bigger bed, so that was where they ended up most days when they felt like spending the night together. This wasn't always the case - sometimes, Harry got up in the night, feeling caged and jumpy, like he should be pacing by the front door, not lie in a comfortable bed with his lover's arm over his chest.

This particular night, Harry didn't want to think about anything but the sensation of Ron's skin stickily sweaty against his own as they panted. Ron's fingers were touching his naked hip. He looked sated and exhausted from their quick tumble.

"You okay?" Ron asked, shifting over, careful not to squash any of Harry's vital parts.

Harry smiled. "Brilliant."

Ron pecked his lips twice, then deepened the kiss until Harry had to physically shove him off so that they wouldn't get lost in each other and spend the rest of the night having sex.

"I'm knackered," he admitted. "Honestly, Ron. Don't."

"Okay, okay, I'm stopping." Ron grinned sheepishly and trailed a finger down Harry's jaw. "What's got you so worked up anyway?"

"Rough practice," Harry said. "I'm getting old."

"Old?" Ron rolled his eyes. "You're twenty-one, not a hundred and twenty-one. The way you're going, you'd think Dumbledore was faster on a broom than you."

Harry snorted. "Figure he ever was on a team?"

"Nah," Ron shrugged. "Doubt it. Probably like Hermione, more with the theory than the actual... you know. Flying." His expression brightened. "Would have been funny to watch, though, wouldn't it?"

"Yeah."

They lay in silence for a few breaths. It was dark outside; nighttime had fallen long before they'd actually found their way into the bed. Since it was winter, the sun set very early. The little lamp by Ron's bedside was constantly switched on, the only source of light illuminating the room. Harry smiled. It had taken Ron a while to adjust to electricity. That had been fun.

"I wonder, sometimes," he said, not quite knowing where he was going yet.

"'bout what?"

"I don't think I want to play Quidditch forever. I mean, it's fun, 'course, I enjoy playing, a lot. I missed it so much - but it's been what now, five months?"

"Barely."

"And it's not enough."

Ron nodded, pulled him closer and then settled into a more comfortable position with his arms above his head. "I thought we would be doing something life-altering after graduation," he said. "That we'd be Aurors or something. Ministry officials. Ambassadors. But then, if you think about the shit we went through, last few years, you have to wonder - who'd wanna be an Auror after that?" He looked at Harry. "At least you get to do what you love."

Harry shrugged. "I don't know if I love playing Quidditch so much that I'd want to do it for the rest of my life. It's just a sport. It's not like my heart is completely in it."

Ron grinned. "That's quite good, I'd reckon. Seeing as I don't like to share."

"Aw," Harry smiled, his hand wandering under the cover. "Lemme check if you've turned into a girl yet."

"Bugger off," Ron snorted. "But seriously, what else do you want to do?"

"What do you want to do?" Harry asked.

"Messing up the Daily Prophet sure isn't my dream job," Ron said. "I mean, it's not like I can't write -"

"No, you're really good at it, surprisingly," Harry teased.

"- but the articles they've got me writing are boring. It was more fun when it was children's books for Muggle shops, like we did together during the war."

"I especially liked the one about the boy who kept his pet dragon hidden," Harry smiled. "I wish we could have shown it to Hagrid."

"Yeah." Ron sighed. "Poor fellow."

Harry bit his lip. Hagrid had been family, too. He kept losing members of his self-made little family, and it hurt. He thought of the Dursleys, who certainly weren't a part of it, and of Hogwarts, which had basically presented him with a place he could feel like part of something.

"By the way, those kids' books paid better than what I'm getting now for writing real facts, can you imagine?" Ron added.

Harry ignored him, turning so he could kiss Ron's neck. "Do you ever think I'm selfish?" he mumbled instead.

"What?" Ron frowned, sitting up a bit. He looked down at Harry confused. "I guess, sometimes, you are? But we all are, aren't we? If we weren't, who else would look out for us?" He tried a grin to cheer Harry up.

Harry smiled, but didn't let go. "I'm thinking of all the kids, I mean. When I was living with the Dursleys, I sometimes thought it would have been better if I'd died with my parents. And I always felt so lonely, even at Hogwarts, thinking about everyone having a real family but me."

"You never said."

"'course not." Harry shrugged. "But I still thought it. It felt like I was the only person who'd ever lost their parents. I couldn't have been, though, I was just the most famous one. Voldemort must have killed lots of families, wizards and muggles, where the kid survived."

"I guess," Ron said. "But you can't think of everyone else. I mean, it's okay to think you're, I don't know. Special or something. Nobody feels exactly the same, right, because you're you, and not someone else."

"That's not what bothers me. It's that some of them might be living with relatives who maybe abuse them one way or the other, or just think they're worthless, or - or in orphanages, or on the streets even. I never - do ophanages for witches and wizards exist?

Ron gave him a long look. "You mean a place where kids go who don't have parents?"

"Yeah."

"Not that I know of. There are families who take in homeless kids. When I was seven, we had a boy staying for one summer at the Burrow, he was Charlie's age, I think. They usually don't foist them around so much, they try to give them to one family to stay, if they can find one. This one was a lot of trouble, so mum offered to take him for the summers until he was of age."

"Oh."

"Yeah. He didn't stay long, just about a month or so, then he took off. I don't remember what happened then."

"What about children who are too young to go to Hogwarts?"

Ron shrugged. "If nobody wants to take them, I'm not sure what happens. The Ministry finds a place for them somewhere. Maybe with Muggles. There is a department for issues like this at the Ministry, but I never asked."

Harry felt himself flush with shame. "I never asked either," he said. "I just thought Mrs. Figg had offered to take June and July because she was, you know. Trying to help."

"Well, she was," Ron pointed out. "They'd have been shipped off to one of those Muggle orphanages you mentioned, probably, if she hadn't taken them in. And then you wouldn't see them at all. It's maybe not the best place to grow up, but I thought you'd always thought it was okay to stay with her, when you were living with the Dursleys?"

"Yeah," Harry nodded with a smile. "The boys are definitely okay. They're being little brats and giving her trouble, she told me when I called her yesterday." Then his grin vanished. "But I gave Betty to you! You said you'd bring her to the Ministry! I thought she was going to end up in a nice orphanage!"

Ron pulled away a bit. "Mate, calm down. I gave her to Neville. He was working closely with the Ministry at the time, and he was the only other guy I trusted there. It was a week before we captured Voldemort, anything else would have been too dangerous. Anyone could have been a traitor. Neville was keeping us all together and cooperating with the Ministry and the Aurors, he was the only one who'd have known if there was any person willing to take a year old little girl into their home."

"Right. Neville." Harry took a deep breath and settled back against the bed. "Neville's okay then. I thought maybe, if a person like Umbridge got a hold of her, I wouldn't - I thought there were places like Hogwarts for younger kids."

"Look." Ron hesitated. "We can try finding her, if you want to check up on her. There should be records." He grimaced. "Well, if that particular archive wasn't destroyed by the attack that day, but I doubt it. They were going for the Mystery Archives and the whole Dark Arts section."

"No wonder Tom Riddle ended up in a Muggle orphanage," Harry muttered. "It's barbaric, how you people deal with social outcasts."

"You people?" Ron raised his eyebrows. "You're a wizard, too, Harry."

Harry shrugged. "As much of a wizard as one can be, I guess, when one can't do magic -"

"You can do magic," Ron nudged him. "You just don't want to. There's a difference. You're still able to, and that's -"

"Let's not talk about that now," Harry closed the discussion.

"Fine," Ron said, annoyed. "Don't talk about it. If it makes you feel better." He huffed.

"It does." Harry touched his wrist. "Look, don't be mad. I was just wondering."

"I know. I'm not mad, I'm annoyed. You never want to talk about this, it drives me crazy. I could have sworn you used to share these things with me."

Harry stayed silent.

"Well, most things," Ron mumbled.

"Actually," Harry admitted.

"Oh, fuck off." Ron sounded really annoyed now. "I know you're big on keeping your secrets, but that doesn't mean I have to like it."

Harry reached for Ron's shoulder, but Ron shrugged him off. "I'm sorry," he said. "I can't help it. It just feels safer to keep some things to myself, so I can think about them before I talk about them with you."

Ron gnawed his lip for a second, then he softened. "But you will tell me about them? Some day?"

Harry nodded. "First one, promise."

"Good."

Ron kissed Harry's forehead before he reached over and turned off the light. Then he laid down and closed his eyes. Harry managed to hold out a minute, waiting in silence, before he said, "Ron?"

"Yes, Harry?"

"Ron, can you -?"

"Right." Ron sat up, ran his hand through his hair and switched the light back on again. He didn't look happy with Harry. "What?"

Harry grimced. "Sorry, I was just - I have to ask now. I won't be able to sleep otherwise."

Ron sighed. He'd learned his patience with time, as this wasn't a once-in-a-lifetime event.

"We usually spend Christmas with your family, but would you mind if we did something different this year?" At Ron's expression, Harry quickly added, "I don't mean not visit at all, I want to see your family, of course, I love to spend Christmas with all of you guys, you know that. But do you think I could have the kids over for Christmas Eve and maybe take them along to the Burrow for the next day?"

Ron's gaze softened. "That's really - that sounds like a great idea. You mean the two boys and Betty, right? I really doubt mum'll mind. If anything, she'll be delighted to have kids in the house again. Especially on Christmas." Then he paused. "We should check if Bill and Charlie are going to be home. I don't think they'd mind...?"

"They'd better not," Harry grinned. "Though Charlie'll probably insist on buying them Quidditch supplies, just in case some of me rubs off, so maybe we should keep it quiet."

Ron snorted. "Sneaky. Mum'd skin me if I didn't tell her right away. She has to prepare, cook, polish all available surfaces..."

"Just ask her," Harry laughed. "I think it would be nice to see them again. I get to see them too little as it is. I love that my Quidditch games are all over Britain, but sometimes it's really inconvenient."

"I'll floo Neville about Betty tomorrow," Ron promised. Then he added, amused, "Do you think you can sleep now?"

Harry smiled. "Yeah. I hope so. Thanks."

Ron switched off the light for the second time and felt Harry press flush to his body, short kiss to Ron's upper arm before he entwined their legs and sighed, content.

 

~*~


End file.
